percolating

that's a word my counselor (yes, we all need a counselor, i'm convinced) uses often. we had a nice chat last evening and i learned that to get the best out of a counseling session or get "my money's worth" i don't have to be in crisis, i don't have to be sobbing out of control or anything like that. i was worried about keeping the appointment because i wasn't feeling as overwhelmed anymore as i was when i made the appointment.
anyhoo...i asked him at the end of our time together if dennis and i should continue to come see him or not. see, we're in a pretty good place considering where we started, but there are things that we could talk about in the presence of a third party every month or so, but like i stated before i usually thought of counseling as a waste of time and money if one or both parties were not falling apart at the seams. so as professional "mess with your head" types do....he said "i'd like you to decide that." then accused me of sinning because he was sure i was thinking "damn you john!" i told him it wasn't sin if it was true. :) so, he said (again) let that percolate in you and e-mail me with your thoughts.
so, during percolation i'm thinking if we want to continue on the road to healthy marriage we should probably stop in every once in awhile for a tune up of sorts.
we talked about my problem with enjoying and really living in the moment without the back of my mind fear that the "other shoe is about to drop". he encouraged me to really live in and enjoy those times when my world is (or seems) perfect. he told me that being IN CHRIST is the only way we can do that. Christ is always in me, but i'm not always in Christ. pray without ceasing type of thing - then my thinking can and will change. i'm challenged to try that.
i'm really loving my new job at mccf. i feel valued, loved, challenged, safe and all sorts of good things.
i'm looking forward to a great weekend of family and thanksgiving. i have so much to be thankful for!